I so love when a new prospect for the Twelve Steps and AA Fellowship of the Spirit shows up.The call came in today. It was a voice-mail from a buddy named Josh - says he's got a friend he wants to introduce and who wants to stop drinking. I call Josh back for a rundown.
Josh has been an acquaintance for a number of years and we see each other at the gym. We met through a protegee of mine who is sober fifteen years and whom for that Josh holds great respect and so through Step One Josh went.
It was a "FAIL".
Josh could not admit powerlessness over EtOH. He could not admit it because it was not true - not his truth. Alcohol was a scourge to him and to others in his family but his truth is that all he had to do to lick the problem was "Just don't' drink".
There is nothing wrong with "Just don't drink" - not when you aren't a real alcoholic there isn't anyway.
When we went through Step One out of the Big Book, "Alcoholics Anonymous" Josh learned what the AA "description of the alcoholic" is.
Guess what? He didn't fit it! Oh he couldn't stop once he started - that much is true - his truth. Still Joshes solution was simply to not take the first drink thereby setting off the physical craving. In other words he even though he suffered form the physical side of the malady he was not afflicted with t he mental part - that inability to leave it alone despite the inability to stop. He just doesn't drink. Period. He hasn't had a drink now in years knowing this about himself - knowing that he is not a real alcoholic but a problem drinker with an easy solution. "Put the plug in the jug!"
This is the absolute beauty and simplicity of Step One. It filters out the non-alcoholics from the alcoholics. God it is SO frakin' simple! I cringe at the thought of all these newcomers out there trying to extrapolate some imagined "step One" code out of the Twelve and Twelve.
Josh has become a cool referrer of others to me over the years because now whenever he comes across someone needing help with their drinking problem I am the first one he thinks of - I am
the guy that spared him a lifelong commitment to AA meetings when it wasn't necessary.I get Joshes guy's number and some vitals - he is single - girlfriend dumped him because of his drinking - no kids - mid thirties - salesman - another one? lives nearby here on the Peninsula of Doom - has gone to a few AA meetings but nothing serious. Hopefully there will not be too much deprogramming involved and we will be able to get him focused less on the meetings and more on the Steps. We shall see. I'm calling him now.
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The call went well with David. It seems that his drinking is "not that serious" - according to him anyway. He' s been a heavy partier all his life and now within the last two years he has been experiencing black outs and the inability to stop whenever he wants. That is a good sign. Yes I said good sign. The more hopeless he is the better his chances.
"OK. Let's meet" I tell him.
Tomorrow, Sunday, July 25th we will meet at Starbucks in Mashpee. David doesn't know it yet but he is going to be taking Step One tomorrow - then if he passes muster he will take Step Two and Step Three - right in Starbucks. The poor SOB won't know what hit him -- not at first at least.
Somewhere in the conversation David got a little rushed and I sensed that he wanted to go. Maybe it's nothing. I am to call him in the morning to set up the time we will meet for our "coffee". Mwaaaahhahahaha!
Everything will be documented here as it happens - as we see just much of drowning man our new prospect is and whether or not he even wants to stop drinking forever. You are invited to join in this incredibly spiritual process we call a Twelve Step Call. This page will be update with new information tomorrow night.
In the meantime please say a prayer for David and for me that I do the right thing - that I keep my self out of this process and that I can truly be helpful to David as well as you dear reader - His will be done. We do not know yet if he is alcoholic but we are soon to find out. So is he. If I do my job right. Stay tuned for the Blow by Blow Step One process on a brand new prospect.
Peace,
Danny S - RLRA
Real Live Alcoholic
